I imagine that this recipe should come with some warnings:
Do not attempt this recipe if you care about your cardiovascular health at all. Do not attempt it if you wish to avoid Type II diabetes. Do not go within a 5-metre radius of the finished product if you want to keep the enamel on your teeth. Do not attempt this recipe if you have a weak stomach or a delicate disposition. This recipe would have been a candidate for thisiswhyyourefat.com if the owner of the site hadn’t deleted it (although Google has lovingly cached it of course). Do not prepare or consume this item while operating heavy machinery. May cause excessive sweating, nervousness, over-excitement or disgust.
That said, as shameful as these things are, they are amazing. And it’s not as if I’ve Lutherised a KFC Double-Down, a.k.a. fried meat + more fried meat + doughnut. This recipe is a petty crime compared to that monstrosity.
It came about out of pure necessity (so I tell myself) when I was trying to put together some form of meal with whatever was hanging around in the kitchen on a public holiday. I had about 20 steamed buns left over from the night before, I had bacon I had bought at the butcher because it was free-range and looked good, and I had bananas which I had bought primarily for their ethylene, so that they would encourage my very unripe chocolate pudding fruit to ripen. A few days previously I had been at a newly opened restaurant and had ordered a dish containing caramelised bananas and I was wistful for them, so they had to make a reappearance. And so everything came together in this ungodly way.
The steamed buns were made using this Momofuku recipe. It’s a bit involved but incredibly worth it, since you can make up 50 of them and then freeze them, and they keep for months and only require a quick steam to reheat them.
The bacon was simply cut into strips then baked in a 200°C oven on the highest rack for about 10 minutes. It was then laid on some paper towel to drain.
And the caramelised bananas were pretty straight-forward:
1/4 cup brown sugar
3 tablespoons of pouring/thickened/heavy cream
Slice the bananas into rounds about 8mm thick. Melt the butter in a frying pan over high heat until it starts to bubble. Add in the bananas and cook for about 3 minutes, stirring and turning them often. Remove them from the butter and put them on a piece of paper towel to drain. Keep the butter hot and add the brown sugar, stirring until the sugar is dissolved. Turn the heat down to medium, add the cream to the sugar and keep stirring constantly, making sure to scrape the bottom and sides of the frying pan so the sugar doesn’t burn on. Keep stirring for 3 minutes. Once this caramel mixture has been bubbling and seething for a little while, it’ll be ready. Remove the bananas from their paper towel and place them in a bowl. Pour the caramel mixture over the bananas.
To assemble the buns: just re-steam the buns to heat them up, spoon some caramelised bananas in, sprinkle some bacon over it, and there you have it. A little bit horrifying in all its sugary and fatty glory (did I mention there’s lard in the steamed buns?), but entirely worth it when you’re just in the mood for something ridiculous like this.